Calendula Fields Permaculture Collective

Thursday, February 14

St. Valentines day

Sitting alone on this day of St Valentine, watching the clouds roll in, [hoping we are in for a summer thunder storm] my mind is thinking of all the best things ... After all, there is no point in wallowing in the fact that there is no lover here - even if I am surrounded everywhere I turn, by images of love, red roses, & love hearts that are all conspiring against me, & trying so hard to make me sick on such a day.

Instead a beautiful line from a pop song has been playing itself in my head - "The stars are blazing like rebel diamonds cut out of the sun" ... along with many thoughts of self-fulling prophecies over the last days. My favourite of which, is a story I wrote when I was about 10 years old.
My best friend did the illustrations & the teacher typed it out on the type writer for me ... I am sure I still have it somewhere. It was a book called 'The day I went to London'. It was a story about winning tickets to see Culture Club & getting to meet Boy George at his house. I wrote details about needing injections before the plane trip [oh the naivety] & the old lady who I had to sit next to on the plane who spilt her tea on me ... but I did not care about spilt tea - I was on my way to London to see Boy George! We got to the concert a few minutes early & so of course we got the best seats right up the front... hehehe ... I had never been to a pop concert when I was 10 - I had no idea ... I only knew that it would be awesome & that it was all I wanted in my life. {My parents were kind enough to let me stay up late & watch the Culture Club concert on telly, that would have to do me for a few years yet.}

But a few years back I did just that - I had fulfilled my own dream /
fulfilled my own prophecy, written when I was 9 or 10 years old. And although the band had changed & I did buy the tickets myself [before even owning a passport] - I went to London to see Blur play in Hyde Park.  And it was indeed the best day of my life! No complications, no hassles of the heart, or anguish over love - just pure joy!
I took my daughter & we sat in the sun all day under union jack umbrellas, watching many a band [including one of her favourites at the time, Crystal Castles - so she was happy.] Meeting lovely people from all over the world who were all there for the same reason ... All waiting for the evening where sixty thousand of us could sing - "It really, really, really could happen ... yes it really, really, really could happen .. when the days they seem to fall through you, well just, let them go ..." - in unison, with tears flowing from our eyes. Truly a magical day & night ... that I got to share with the one I love most in this world - My little girl <3 ... who insists on growing up very fast! {And lucky for me, as an added bonus the gig was put on dvd, so I can relive it when ever I need … although I tend not too because it is just too much emotion to deal with when it is not shared with sixty thousand other souls.}
I may not have got to have tea with Damon Albarn at his house, like I did with Boy George in my primary school story book, but I did get to say hi & thank him for the best day of my life a few years later in Melbourne & share a smile ... & that is kind of the same ... because we should never meet our hero's anyway.

Anyway … Many of you who 'like' my face book page, or buy my creations on, or are whom I chat with in the made it sellers group, don't actually know who I am or what I look like ... It is pretty hard to find a picture of me on this here intrawebs, & it is very easy to remain anonymous when you sell on line ... Plus I am pretty shy about such things, & I suppose it's because I make fabric things for babies & I don't really seem like the type - I have too many tattoos & stupidly long hair! So I don't want to give off the wrong impression ... Books & covers, & all that.
But this year I have a lot of things to work on, & lots of things to go through ... & me thinks that this here blog would be a good place to start [because maybe no one reads it at all, & I am not really exposing myself to anyone. At least that is what I will end up telling myself so as not to delete any of this, & to keep myself as real & raw as I can.]

So here is to a new start, a new beginning, & a new way of doing things … And here is a picture of me & my girl at the Blur concert in London … on the best & happiest day of my life! ... Look I am almost smiling! :) hehehe

With much love to all the lovers & not fighters out there on this night of love ... St Valentines day <3


Kylie said...

Love, love, love!! So wonderful to see you "exposing yourself" Elodie! Poo to the "wrong impression!" authenticity & vulnerability are beautiful.. so is your photo and your story. Thanks for sharing it xx

i made this for you said...

Thanks Kylie :) You rock! xx